Daze of Write and Roses

Two

When I was a child of two or three
We went for a drive, my family and me
At Christmas time, in the dark of night
To look at the carriers all alight
We drove down the pier and we looked at the ships
(A journey much shorter than some other trips)
I was learning my numbers and saw one I knew
I pointed my finger and cried in awe, "Two!"
And although it's been many years since then
My mom tells the story again and again
Of that two in the sky that I saw glowing bright
And pointed out proudly that cold winter's night
They don't light them up now, and you can't drive down
The piers by yourself, not in this Navy town
But though I'm twenty-five (nearly) now, this is true:
I shall never forget how much I loved that two.

All right...so I finally caved and decided to do OctPoWriMo 2014. It's technically Day 4, so I've got a few days to catch up on. This is for Day 01: Breaking Out of the Box. The title of this poem is from the poem "The Butterfly Jar" by Jeff Moss.

When You Are Here With Me

When I was a little girl
I had a book of poetry called The Butterfly Jar.
The first poem
was all about how thoughts and dreams are like
butterflies.
I thought about that a lot.
I thought about how
my thoughts wanted to be free
my dreams wanted to take flight
my hopes wanted to be shared.

When I was a little girl
I had a lot of ideas about what to be when I grew up.
I wanted to be
a nurse
or a teacher
or a stay-at-home mom
or an Olympic gymnast
or a lawyer
or a minister
or a pilot
or a ballerina
or a famous musician
or an astronaut
or an actress.
I thought a lot about what I would do.
I thought about what would happen
if I got to do one of these things someday
if I became somebody famous
if someday they wrote books about me.

When I was a little girl
I had people who would ask me what I wanted to be.
I would tell them what I dreamed about
on that particular afternoon.
And they would almost always tell me
that I would never do it
that it would take too many years
that I didn't have what it took
that I wasn't smart enough
or pretty enough
or thin enough
or good enough
I
wasn't
enough
for any of them.

When I was a little girl
I spun my chrysalis
not to nurture my ambitions
but to protect me
to shield me from a world that didn't believe
in the power of my dreams
to block out the sounds of doubts
but what I didn't realize
was that locking out everyone else's doubts
just left me locked in with my own.
I didn't care
because at least I was safe
at least no one would kill my butterflies
before I was ready to let them free.

When I was a young woman
people started asking me again what I wanted to be.
I told them that I wanted to be
a writer.
And my grandparents told me
it was a waste of time
and my father told me
it wouldn't pay
and my mother told me
I'd better have something to fall back on.
And then I met my friends
my sorority sisters
my writing group
and they
told
me
yes
they told me that I could do it
they told me that I would do it
they told me that they wanted to see what I had written
and I showed them
and they asked for more.

When I was a little girl
I spun a chrysalis to protect myself.
And when I was a young woman
I found friends who put me in a safe place
where I could be nurtured and grow.
And now
I
am
free.